First video in a while! (Get ready for a bunch more this holiday season) This video features our friend Ayesha and Arlie talking about the difference between bisexuality and pansexuality. We have both identified as each over the years, so we have a bit of insight about the implications of the labels, from the perspective of young cis women. Our main points we tried to fit into the video are:
- “bisexual” and “pansexual” are both ways of describing attraction to people of more than one gender
- “pansexual” implies but does not mean attraction to all genders, and has undertones of attraction regardless of gender
- “bisexual” does NOT mean attraction to both or two genders, but rather attraction to people of your own gender and different genders
- the term “bisexual” is not binarist, gender essentialist, transphobic, or trans exclusive
- a personal interpretation of bisexuality is that it implies differential attraction to different genders or gender presentations – this isn’t true of all bisexuals!
- bisexuals and pansexuals are often subject to some misfortunes
- stereotype of promiscuity
- rejection by monosexuals
- keep in mind that:
- sexual orientation is not the same as sexual behaviour!
- sexual orientation is not always the same as romantic orientation
- you don’t need to label your sexual orientation if you feel it’s not helpful
- if you want, you can use a more encompassing term, like “queer”
Things I want to stress if you’re figuring out your sexuality:
- It’s ok to be confused!
- It’s ok if your preferences change!
- It’s ok if you want to change your labels!
- It’s ok to “experiment”
- It’s ok to be promiscuous if you want to be
- You can still be bi or pan if you’ve only ever been with people of one gender
- None of these things make your sexuality invalid
This website deals with most of the stuff we talked about, and gets a little more in-depth.
If you have any questions about anything we mention, Google is your friend! Also feel free to comment, ask us stuff, add your experiences, we want to hear what people are thinking about this topic!